Reply To: What Occurred with cclarry Yesterday

[peter]

On Hoppy said

It’s a shame that it ended so acrimoniously with Larry. Thinking back to the insane amount of deal posting that Larry did over the years, you could certainly make the argument that his obsessive posting had perhaps become a bit unhealthy. We all enjoyed the benefits of his compulsion with no questions asked as to the amount of his time it consumed. That said, Larry did enjoy somewhat of a hero status on the Cakewalk deals forum. If you don’t have a lot going on, this could provide a sense of community and a good self estimate bump. I think Larry really enjoyed the roll of king deal poster. In the big picture, there are far worse addictions than finding deals and posting them. It’s sad to see Larry go, but I am in 100% agreement with you Peter that this forum should remain a refuge from politics and divisiveness. When I stop by Linked Musicians I want to focus on making music!

Soul, Blues, & Jazz on a Wurli or Rhodes is my groove.

If Larry did call me to acknowledge that he made some mistakes, and I had confidence that he could abide by the rules — or that he would at least make a serious effort — I would be open to him returning. I’d also want him to scale back his posting and not make it his entire life. Anyhow, I pulled this thread back. I realize, I’m very strong with transparency, but I also lead with my heart, and still see that Larry is a person I’ve considered a friend and do care about even though I’m incredibly disappointed in all of this. But could it change with a heart to heart conversation and a commitment? Yes. But I don’t believe that’s very likely.

I’ll just share this. My kids are 19 and 15. My wife has told me that I’m a “terrible disciplinarian.” She says, “You’re good at making firm rules, but the kids know how to pull at your heart strings to get out of it.” Last week, I had some left over chicken on a plate on the table. I went to grab some raspberries, and before you know it, my cat jumped on the table and shoved his face into my chicken. I told my wife, “I planned on giving him some of that chicken, until he did that! I told him that you just blew your chance to get some of this chicken!” My wife said, “I know you too well, he ended up getting chicken.” Touché.  That is the real me. I am really good at creating rules and yeah, my heart causes me to yearn to give people — and small domestic animals too apparently — second chances.

So yeah, no one would be happier than me if there was a happy ending to this. There’s no question about it. And yeah, I was more bothered for kids when Jeff was calling me an f’ing R word — he called me a bunch of other names, but the R word really bummed me out not about me, but that he dehumanizes people (my daughter volunteers with intellectually disabled kids, and talks about how kids her age use that term — and has cried about hearing them use it and I feel the way she does). But, of course, I don’t want abusive people in my life or anyone elses and both of these individuals are elderly men who are abusive and unlikely to change their ways. Would I love to see believable apologies and give a second chance? Abso-freaking-lutely I would. Although, I realize that their problematic behavior will likely repeat. The upside of it is that it’s not a shock the second time.

LinkedMusicians Founder. Your friend who keeps the beat.

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