Reply To: IK Multimedia T-RackS 6 MAX $29.99 [DEAL OVER]

[Peter DeLegge]

Oh no, one of the things I DON’T enjoy about buying from Sweetwater online is that an intrusive salesperson will call you. Good thing I didn’t provide my mobile number. I already have a voicemail.

Here’s my tip for getting rid of telemarketing people calling unsolicited (in the US there is something called a DO NOT CALL registry the government maintains and if you register your number, companies are forbidden from calling you on that number unless you have provided your consent in advance). It doesn’t apply to Sweetwater, but I thought I’d use this occasion to share it.

I’ve tried all sorts of methods to get off the phone with a telemarketer when caller ID doesn’t make it clear that the call is from a telemarketer (because I usually would not intentionally pick up a call from an unsolicited telemarketer who is breaking the law by calling my number). So, a few years ago, I found the perfect solution — and it entertains my family too. So, I’ll cut to the chase and give you a typical scenario of a call:

TELEMARKETER: Hello is this Mr. [my real last name, completely butchered or “Is this the person living at [my home address].]

ME: Ehh….caio? {stated in the most unathentic, over the top terrible, Adam Sandler inspired faux Italian accent.]

TELEMARKETER: Hello?

ME: Ehhhhhhh…caio??????????

TELEMARKETER: Hello?

ME: Eh…CAIO!!!

TELEMARKETER: Hello? You don’t speak English?

ME: [Completely drops accent, uses regular American speaking voice.] No, not a word of it.

TELEMARKETER: [HANGS UP.]

Works every time. Another script:

TELEMARKETER: Hello, is this…

ME: Chicago Foresonics team, agent Smith speaking.

TELEMARKETER: Hello, is this [yada, yada, yada….]

ME: You mean the deceased? What is your relationship with him? Are you a friend? A relative? When did you last see him?

TELEMARKETER: [Hangs up.]

 

Yes, I have actually been doing this for years and it’s turned an annoyance into family entertainment. The more over the top the better. I have also gotten the telemarketers to laugh when they realize what I’m doing is not serious.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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